Checking A Phone While You Confess

Black Rock – Yeah Yeah

This new videogame is called I-BANKER. You play as a freshly-minted MBA who just acquired his or her first big time job, at an old and prestigious firm in New York. The company’s interests extend in dendritic fashion to all forms of industry and enterprise: telecommunications, real estate, pharmaceuticals, precious metals and mining, health care, and emerging markets. For most of the first part of the game, you sit at your desk, working on the valuation of a company that makes contact lenses which render QR codes legible to the human eye. It’s a tough valuation, with lots of problems, and a high degree of connectivity between those problems, so naturally the project is taking a while to complete. While you work on the valuation (in real time within the game) you have the opportunity to decide what sort of worker your character will be. You can make your worker a go-getter who eats lunch at her desk and stays at the office long after the lights have gone out, or you can make your worker a shiftless, lazy dreamer who spends hours on the internet reading golf blogs. Whichever style of work you choose for your employee, there are consequences. If you turn into a grind and spend 90 hours a week at the office, after a few pay periods you’ll notice your character’s hair turning gray at the temples or at the crown, and fine micro-wrinkles appearing around the eyes and forehead. If you turn into an inert wastrel, you’ll retain your youthful looks but will be passed over for promotions and sink, after your performance review, into a depression akin to an oubliette from which you will never escape. It’s a pretty fun game.

[BUY Chains & Black Exhaust]

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